Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Choice. Decision. Outcome.

A lot of things, in fact most things, come down to those three words. We have choices presented to us, we make a decision, and we have to live with the outcome. Good or bad.

  • Choice
  • Decision
  • Outcome

I'm sure there's even some mathematical or probability equation that defines the order of the events. Something like:

(this is actually the equation for something that I don't know & is for illustration purposes only!)

As I am getting ready to go to Washington D.C. for The Nation's Triathlon, I am not feeling ready. Not one bit. Not even close. This is not a good feeling to have five days before a race. And so I've tried to figure out why I don't feel ready. I had a good base and I've done the training. Right??

Yeahhhh. About that. Maybe not so much. Something happened to me this season that drained all the Oomph! from me. The fire in my belly to train more, train harder, died somewhere along the way. Was it the personal issues I've had? Was it selling my house and moving? Was it the never-ending fundraising? Was it the stress of an increased work load when my coordinator was out for two months? Maybe it was all of that plus stuff in my sub-psyche that I don't even know about yet.

What I do know is that I slacked off on my cycling and tapered off on my running. About the only thing I did regularly was swim; and I'm certainly not gaining any race time there. When I jump in the Potomac River on September 13, I have no idea what to expect from body. I might do great or I might slug my through it praying for the end. Hell I might bonk.

I look back and I'm a little disappointed in myself. Maybe I could've carved out more time. Maybe I could've made less excuses. But I chose not to. I made a decision to put training off. And now the outcome just might be a poor race performance.

At this point, there's nothing I can do to make up for it. I'm at a certain fitness level and that's what I'll have to work with during the race. I don't know if I'll beat my personal best of 3:05 and I'm not even sure I'll beat my time of 3:17:11 from Nation's Triathlon last year. So now I have a new choice presented to me:

  • Choice - Play it safe? Or push it to the limit?
  • Decision - Balls out the whole way
  • Outcome - Time will tell

Stay tuned ......

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